3 Reasons Why I'm a Hypocrite

Hey kids! Welcome to class. Why am I calling it class? Because I'm about to school you on the reasons why I'm a total freaking hypocrite. Doesn't that sound like fun? Come, join me!

I think we all are a little bit hypocritical, but I'm not above admitting the reasons out loud. (To be fair, I'm not above admitting a lot of things. It's been pointed out to me, and I've said it before myself: I have no shame.)

This background image has nothing to do with being a hypocrite, it's just a really pretty photo from our wedding.
You're welcome.

1. Sandals Resorts. Let's start off with the reason this post idea came to mind. I started thinking this list up the other day when I was watching TV and I saw an add for Sandals Resorts. In college, I took a class on travel and tourism (yes, this was a legit class and it was AWESOME). One of the few things I actually remember from this class was being taught that many all-inclusive resorts, Sandals being one of the top-dawgs, funnel their profits back to America and pay their local employees pennies on the dollar. Being that these resorts are all inclusive, it doesn't give their visitors much reason to venture off of their site and funnel some of their money into the local economy, so that's killing the economy of that island in two ways. I'm a big believer in supporting local communities, wherever you may be at. I also have spent a lot of time explaining this issue to people who aren't aware of it. This is where I become a hypocrite, because I would stay in a sandals resort IN A HEART BEAT. The service, beauty, and relaxation it looks like it provides just calllllls out to me. I feel like a fraud.

2. Health and Fitness: I've done a LOT of research into various subjects of health and fitness. I took a few classes in college and can safely say that I spent a lot of my young-life being a yo-yo dieter. Eventually I got frustrated and started looking up answers on questions I had about why things weren't working. I obviously wouldn't consider myself an expert on this subject at all, as I have no degree and no formal schooling past a few college classes, but I would definitely consider myself somewhat educated on the topic. This is where I become a hypocrite, because that saying "Those who can't do, teach," was made for me. I'm constantly dishing out advice to anyone who will listen about the things they should do to get healthy, but I can't practice them for the life of me. For example, on Friday I stated to my coworker, "I'm going to enjoy this weekend, and my birthday on Monday, but on Tuesday I have GOT to start eating healthy and working out. I need to make 26 the year I make changes," and the day after I proceeded to sleep until 15 minutes before I had to log on for work, and I also ate the night befores left over jambalaya pasta and red velvet cake for lunch. Oh, not to mention I had a medium Summertime RedBull and a big bowl of Lucky Charms for breakfast.

3. Eyebrows: This might be a strange one to see on this list, but it's the damn truth. I'm a HUGE judger of peoples eyebrows. Until I was in high school, I'm not even sure that I noticed that people had eyebrows. I attribute the fact that I finally took notice of them to my best friend, Rachel, as she is totally obsessed with them and was the first to ever ask if she could pluck mine. Any time I'm watching someone on TV, male or female, one of the first things I look at and comment on is wether or not I like their eyebrows. To me, they can make a persons face. This is where I become a hypocrite, because I probably remember to pluck my eyebrows every other month, and I do absolutely nothing to enhance my face with them. Granted, I don't have naturally bushy eyebrows (I accidentally typed eyebrowns and now I'm imagining someone with hashbrowns for eyebrows) and they're dirty blonde, so for the most part they just settle into my face and don't bother anyone, but I'm sure there are a TON of people out there who would call me a big ole' hypocrite because mine are rarely in top form. (Side note: I thought this reason up while I was driving and used my voice text to make a note of it. I said out loud, "Talk about my bushy eyebrows in selfies," just as a quick note to remember, and my iPhone wrote, "Talk about my fishy eyebrows in self." And then I pictured someone with fish for eyebrows on the cover of Self Magazine, so you know, there's been a lot of weird eyebrow imagining happening around here between the 'eyebrowns' and the fishy note.)

This is only three reasons, but I'm sure there are many more things I could put on this list if I really took the time to think, but right now it's 7:30am and I've been up since 6:45am finishing this post up, and all I really wanted to do was go back to sleep, but I DIDN'T, so that I could post this for you today. You're welcome.

Also, that was kind of wordy, so four gold stars for you if you made it all of the way through.

I leave you with this, because this is how I feel about the fact that it's Thursday and my friend, Llindsey, is coming to town and it will be the first time I've seen her in 5 years.

Hashbrown selfie.