Am I a Bad Wife?

I've been struggling for topics lately, as I've been trying to write every day and since we don't have a whole lot going on right now, the topics run dry pretty quick. So it got me thinking about my every day. What do I do? I wake up, lounge in bed checking my emails and social media for a bit, pack a lunch, rush getting ready, and go to work. Where I sit for 8.5 hours either working or slacking off, but most of the time both, until the clock hits 5pm. At which point I hop in my car and head home.

Lately, the one constant that follows this is that my husband is home. Back before he became the sole authority at his work, I usually had 2 nights, and about 7 hours on Sunday all to myself. 

I'm one of those people that desperately needs alone time (and no, not so I can fart of pick my nose, but I'm not saying those things don't happen). Those times when Jason would be working were such a benefit to me. As of the last month or so, though, Jason has been home pretty much every night. This has made it difficult for me to write posts, paint my nails, catch up on Nashville, and Pinterest my little heart out. I feel guilty when I'm online if he's home. In some ways, I feel like I need to attend to him, because I know he works so much harder during the day than I do. Sometimes, I just pray that he'll fall asleep after I feed him and give me some peace and quiet.

Am I the only one out there that needs a break like this? I'm sorry, I love him to bits and pieces, but I really function better when I have time to myself. Am I a bad wife for wanting my husband to be away more?

My best friends mom once told me that people often ask her how she and her husband are still so happy together after 30 years. She told me that her answer was simple: he travels for work. They get time away from each other and that allows for them to miss each other. I know that this is a simple concept, one that many people practice, but when I leave Jason at home and go see my girlfriends, I feel so guilty.

I know that he would like to be out having fun, too, but his life doesn't currently permit for it. I just feel like it's unfair for him that he doesn't get any fun free time, and I have a chance every weekend. But then I think to myself, he could have fun time if he wanted it. He chooses not to.

So basically the point of this post is that I feel like a bad wife for wanting to get the hell away from my husband but then I feel like a good wife because I feel guilty when I am away from him.

But both of those are wrong.

Someone please fix my feels.

On one last note, why is this not right now?